Simple Gatherings for a Warmer Winter
I spent my early twenties living in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. I was a student at Marquette University and was living on my own for the first time. I suppose “on my own” is not quite the right way to put it, as I lived with an assortment of roommates throughout my time there, and in that time spent with others, I learned something that has forever shaped my life: winter (even a Milwaukee winter!) is more than tolerable when spent in the company of others.
Towards the latter part of my time in Milwaukee, I lived in a quirky little “underground” apartment we lovingly called “the Garden Unit.” For those of you who’ve known me through that time of my life will know that it was my first real home away from home. I started my first blog there, I made my first batches of caramels there, I knit with my roommates there and started my own crafting business there (with two of my dearest friends!).
Food is a natural magnet to bringing people together!
I remember the first time my roommates Jill and Kelsey and I hosted our first potluck in the Garden Unit - we spent the day jamming to Tina Turner as we cleaned the place from top to bottom, prepared food to share and added finished touches to make our home extra inviting. The invitation had been extended to twenty or so of our close friends and the party was to start at 6 pm. When 6 o’clock rolled around, we hosts were dressed and ready for our guests to arrive and when they didn’t come at the stroke of 6 I remember thinking to myself as we waited anxiously “Oh no - what if no one comes? What if our party is a total flop?” But of course our friends came! In their own time, with warm food and big hugs. Our little apartment quickly filled with the joy of company and shared food. No one cared that our house was meticulously cleaned, what mattered was that we were together.
After that first gathering, I learned something that has been a guiding principle in my life since: “No one knows what the party was supposed to be except the host; and everyone else just has a good time!” What I mean to say is that even if we hadn’t mopped our kitchen floors that day or baked the perfect pie, our guests would have enjoyed themselves just by being in each other’s company. It took SO MUCH pressure off of hosting! And it started a tradition of gathering in our home and in our friends homes for years to come.
If you’ve got the time, it’s really fun to send an invite in the mail!
Of course, there are some things to consider when hosting others, but I am here to say that YOU CAN DO IT! And it’s not that hard and it will probably make your days feel full: of love and friendship. Especially in winter, I truly believe there is nothing like a gathering with friends and loved ones to brighten even the darkest of days. Here are a few simple things to help you host your way through winter (or any season really):
Pick a date & time and put it on the calendar!
You won’t be able to accommodate everyone’s schedule, but do your best to consider your friends and their schedules to pick a time that generally works for them and for you. Sometimes picking a date can be the hardest part, but don’t let it keep you from getting together!
I was talking with my friend Bridget recently, and she shared with me her family’s new years resolution: they made a list of things that are important to them to do on a weekly and monthly basis and put it on their fridge. Gathering with friends was a shared weekly priority, so they made it just that: A PRIORITY!
Invite your friends, new and old
In this day in age, an invite can be anything from a formal letter (I know I love to receive mail!) or a text or an email or a call. You get the picture! Write down a list of friends you want to invite - it doesn’t have to be everyone you know, or maybe you want it that way - you can host how ever you’d like!
Have a neighbor or a new friend that you’d like to introduce to your community? Hosting a small gathering is a great way to encourage new friendships! It can be fun to see what comes of bringing unique groups of people together.
When I lived in Milwaukee and even onto Omaha, I loved to host a weekly gathering we fondly called “Chili Night” - it was every Sunday from November through March-ish, and it was an open invite. I would make a pot of chili and friends could bring anything (or nothing!) to share on the side. Two of our friends even met at a chili night years ago and have since gotten married and are expecting their first baby in March! Talk about magic!
Food is the key to everyone’s hearts!
Want to make food for your company? Consider making something ahead of time so that you can be present when your company comes. A crockpot of a pot full of soup is always a welcome meal in the winter! Or a casserole or simple snacks depending on the time of your gathering. Remember, it doesn’t have to be complicated! Be sure to ask your guests ahead of time to see if anyone has food sensitivities so everyone feels welcome at the table.
Don’t like to cook, but still want to host? No problem! You could make it a potluck - offer to provide a main dish and invite your guests to bring something to share on the side. Pro tip: You don’t even have to cook if you don’t want to! Call your favorite restaurant and see what they have for group takeout! Chances are they’ll be happy to work with you on even a small order and then you can focus on being with your company.
Don’t want to host at your house? No problem!
Sometimes, your house isn’t the best place for large groups of people. Or you’re a private person who doesn’t like to have your life on display. Or, you just want a reason to get out of the house! NO PROBLEM! You can host a meaningful gathering in all sorts of places: consider meeting at a local coffee shop, your favorite restaurant, or a local museum. Plan a group walk with a stop for hot cocoa and a pastry afterwards. There are many ways to host, and with practice, you’ll find what works best for you. Every gathering can be different, so mix it up and try out new things - you’ll be surprised at what you can do together!
Be PRESENT
Put away your phone & enjoy the company of the people you are with. You’ve taken time from your busy lives to be together! Play a card game, play a board game, play some music! You’ll be amazed at how wonderful it is what you’re not distracted.
However you choose to gather, remember that what is important is the time spent together. It doesn’t have to be fancy or over the top to be special - but if that’s your style, then by all means! Most importantly, don’t let the planning and prep work get in the way of you hosting.
Gathering with others has been a key element to my well-being for many winters. I’ll be honest, I haven’t always loved winter and by the end of it, I am certainly ready for spring. But I find that the days I am feeling most blue are the days that have been uninterrupted - days spent in the humdrum routine of life. When I reflect on that, I realize that the best medicine (for me) is to gather with friends. So, I make it a priority, I reach out and set a date. And just like that, there is a new routine, a welcome routine and pretty soon spring is here!
